Due to force of habit I always remember March 17 as St. Patrick’s Day even if I’m not Irish. I’m not even going to pretend that I know all the saints; the only reason I love this day is because it gives you a free pass to drink until you see rainbows and until leprechauns start looking like Chris O’Dowd (or Michael Fassbender or any Irish dude you find attractive but this is my blog so I’m going with Chris O’Dowd). Some might argue and say that I’m stereotyping because not all Irish people drink but I swear, there’s European level of drinking (which is something even I haven’t met with my 8-Pilsen record)…and then there’s Irish level of drinking. It’s in-freaking-sane.

I also made a St. Patrick’s Day look last year

but it wouldn’t be fun if I just repeat it for this year, would it? Plus, I need to show progress somehow, despite my dwindling makeup addiction soo:

1. First things first: You’re going to attached a freakin beer can on your face so make sure it’s clean. Clean a Guinness by spilling every drop of that rich, dark, roasted goodness down your throat. 
2. Regret nothing. Convince yourself that you’re drinking FOR A MAKEUP PROJECT FOR YOUR BLOG; surely you are still the more responsible, more mature Tita that you are now!!!

   

3. Trim it diagonally, rinse and set it aside.
4. For the eye: 
   1. Rub a bit of eyeshadow primer (Lorac Behind The Scenes Eye Primer) to make the colors stick and pop.
   2. Apply 2 shades of brown eyeshadow on the crease. Lorac Pro Palette’s Taupe for the inner corner, and a warmer brown like bareMineral’s soft focus face color in Warmth for the outer corner.
   3. For the green eyeshadow I went with Urban Decay’s Graffiti but I didn’t like how bright it was so I added a layer of shimmery dark green eyeshadow like Coastal Scent’s Balsam over it. Dab a bit of glittery green eyeshadow like Urban Decay’s Lightyear on the center. Repeat step for the area under your lower lash line.
   4. Darken the outer corner of your lid with a dark, glittery gray eyeshadow like Lorac Pro’s Slate. Repeat step for the area under your lower lash line.
   5. Blend like every stroke burns calories.
   6. Line your lid with a black eyeliner pen from K-Palette. Line your lower waterline with a gold retractable eye pencil from Nyx.
   7. Make your eyelashes seem longer than your patience with Benefit’s They’re Real tinted eyelash primer + Benefit’s Roller Gal mascara.
   8. Fill in your brow with K-Palette Tattoo Real Lasting Eyebrow Liner in 01-Natural Brown.
5. For the lips, I used a dark green liquid lipstick like LA Splash in Nagini. Totally appropriate because St. Patrick totaaaally drove all dem “snakes” away from Ireland amirite
6. For the face:
   1. Rub a bit of makeup primer (bareMinerals Prime Time) all over your face to make your liquid foundation (L’Oreal’s Infallible in Radiant Beige) appear as if it’s applied on an acne-free canvas.
   2. Cast a shadow on every area you wanna trim down (this technique does not apply on your tummy not that I tried…) with bareMinerals soft focus in Warmth, and highlight with Benefit’s Watt’s Up). Add a bit of blush if you want.
   3. Use an eyepencil to trace the area where you’re going to stick the beer can.
   4. Line that area with little bits of tissue soaked in liquid latex (YES SA WAKAS NAKAHANAP NA AKO AND I’M USING GRAFTOBIAN)
   5. Stick the beer can before the liquid latex dries. Add more bits of liquid latexed tissue to secure it.
   6. Because it’s so hard to see with only one eye, you’ll discover that you mistakenly grabbed one of your good brushes (that brush that came along with your Naked 2!!!!) to apply the liquid latex. Hate yourself, repeat until you lose some sleep because how else are you gonna replace that brush without buying a new palette?!?!!?
   7. Mourn for the loss of a good makeup brush by dabbing a bit of purple eyeshadow around the beer can area for some kinda bruising effect.
   8. Once the tissue bits are dried, cover them up with the same foundation you used on your face.
   9. Let fake blood (a mixture of cocoa powder + pancake syrup + red facepaint) drip around the beer can to make it appear as if some Irish dude with super drunk Irish strength impaled your smartass face with his drink.