As I’ve mentioned in my last post, I lost the drive to execute my September birthday makeup look because I didn’t feel like the accompanying, cheesy “30 Things I Learned at 30” list was still applicable. 

But then I realized that: a) life goes on, b) I need to make the most out of this Halloween month c) what’s the use of writing for a living if I can’t revise and recycle my draft?

So scratch that. Let me post my “30 Things…” list with a different makeup look. It’s inspired by the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with gold called “Kintsukuroi” (or “Kintsugi”).

By this time I should hate everything associated with Japan thanks to that fateful video call that made everything unravel like instant ramen in hot water…but I don’t. First because I admire the philosophy behind Kintsukuroi: it treats breakage/ repair as part of the history of an object; it embraces the imperfections that make the object unique and intact instead of trying throw it away. #ThereIsBeautyInImperfection Second because to stay broken is soo unKintsukuroi yo.

What I did:

I don’t really know how I can elaborate about the process…because basically, I just:

• mixed white & black facepaint from my Flash palette to create gray,
• applied that all over my face with a beauty sponge,
• used a matte black eyeshadow (Blackout from the Naked 2 palette) for contouring + smokey eyeshadow, used my black facepaint as lipstick + eyebrow tint,
• ghetto airbrushed the specks using a wet toothbrush dipped in black & white facepaint for a concrete-looking texture,
• then drew the broken lines with gold facepaint. Finished the look with falsies dipped in the same gold facepaint.

That’s it! Easy no? You should stop reading now if you came for the makeup look because I’m about to start yapping about my very pa-serious, very pa-grownup, Thought Catalog levels of:

30 Things I Learned/Still Trying To Learn As A 30yo

1. The world doesn’t owe you anything. I’ve encountered people who deserve better—from the most dedicated still struggling to make ends meet, to the healthiest suddenly inflicted with serious health conditions. I’m not saying that we should stop making an effort to lead a better life; we just need to keep moving forward without bombarding God/our parents/employers/significant others about how much they need to make up for our grief and even the score. In short: sh*t happens. If it doesn’t? Be grateful.
2. Believe in yourself. I’d like to say thank you to whoever made this statement. I actually have it saved in my phone because I, a fast-walking tornado of introversion and social anxiety, need to remind myself that there are times when I reaaally need to step up (which is how I managed to function during those times I served as a workshop host—I didn’t want to make people regret trusting/paying me for my work!)
3. “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter for always there will be greater or lesser persons than yourself.”—from “some poem” I forced myself to memorize to avoid demerits in high school (yeah I like pretending that I can no longer recite nor remember “this poem” lol)
4. Follow your passion in your own way. I’ve learned that there’s no right or wrong path when it comes to pursuing your passion. Some do it by dedicating every moment of their life to it. I tried that, until I’ve realized that it only leads to me feeling even more burnout and uninterested about what I used to look forward to doing. Like, I can certainly pursue my passion for makeup, but I’m choosing to stick to my current dayjob (that’s waaay far from the cosmetics industry)…first for the stability, second for the new things I never would have learned if I allowed my world to revolve around makeup…and third because I want to continue seeing makeup as my hobby that excites me, and not as an obligation I have to perform. At the end of the day, knowing what you’re passionate about is what matters.
5. Find peace in your own company. I’ve only started taking solo trips 3 years ago, because I was so scared of people branding me as “too independent” “too antisocial” or even “emo”. It’s not because I hate socializing; it’s because I’ve learned that nothing feels more exhilarating than overcoming your anxieties and having the freedom to discover new places down to their last quirk. Besides if there’s a 90% chance you’re gonna live a life in a humble abode that smells of cat piss, you better learn how to be comfortable with yourself pronto…
6. Food is not the enemy. There was a time in my life when I religiously stuck to a half rice diet because I was scared of morphing back to my huffing-and-puffing-OMG-I’m-not-even-halfway-up-the-stairs-yet, 2012 self:

   

   But screw the half rice diet! Without full meals, I’d have no brainpower for the entire work day plus my gusto-ko-na-mapudpod-tong-sapatos-ko-so-i-can-start-anew nightly runs. Food isn’t my enemy; being a lazyass is.
7. Not fat =/= Healthy. While I still support the keto diet (aka THE BACON DIET that helped me trim down from my 160lbs [YEPPP!!] self 4 years ago), I don’t think I can do it again. Now I look forward to eating carbs + meat + what I used to call “rabbit food” whenever possible—not because veggies are diet-friendly, but because I see no point of not being fat if I feel sluggish/bloated all the time. Don’t forget your greens yo.
8. Trends come and go; remember to #BuyItForLife. If my 4-year-old olive green Northface backpack can talk, I bet it’s going to sound like a tired Kris Aquino doing a tell-all—from namedropping all the places and people we’ve visited, to complaining about the questionable items I’ve hidden in its compartments during my #EdgeLord phase. The point is, it still hasn’t lost its function (aka Why I Bought It In The First Place!) and the usual “Naglayas ka ba?” “Ang laki ng bag mo!” comments didn’t make the world end, soo…I don’t see the need to buy that olive green Kanken bag I’ve been eyeing yet as I’m more excited with the idea of adding country flag patches to my bag instead. #NextLevelNamaste
9. Money is important…but sometimes, memories are importanter. I’ve tamed myself down in a way that I can enter AND EXIT the mall without even a single tube of new lipstick (as someone who prefers makeup over clothes, THAT says a lot), but I’ve also learned to appreciate collecting memories. I can barely remember what happened on the days I purchased big ticket items, but I can still talk endlessly about my Bangkok trip like it hasn’t been two months since it happened. I guess what I’m saying is: remember to give yourself a break once in a while—and when you do, go for something you can look back on and brag to your future grandkids. “…and then since Thailand doesn’t offer OTC anti-histamines, your lola decided to sleep her allergies off, and then she woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom…without bringing her keycard so she got stuck in the hostel lobby until 5am, itching and scratching…” So yeah, we have the rest of our lives buying material things; don’t miss out on moments that may never happen again.
10. Stay away from people who are rude to waiters and cashiers. Sure, I’ve had my share of bitchfests with rude waiters, but if someone treats them badly with no justifiable cause (you know the type—the powertripping, give-me-five-star-treatment-or-I’ll-call-the-manager matapobre who probably leads a life so sad, he/she just has to get an ego boost by stepping on others), these are not the people you’d want in your life. You don’t need to be an extrovert to learn how to say “please”, “thank you”, or even joke around with people who make a living serving others.
11. Respect hard work. I’ve worked with enough creative professionals to know that I can’t just ask them to design my website or take my photo for friendship’s sake—and to do so is very nakakahiya because dude, that’s their bread and butter! If you really value your friendship then you would think twice before taking advantage of them because it’s not as if they can just create something out of thin air. Mahiya ka naman sa eyebags nila, lalo na ng mga nagfe-freelance na walang kasiguraduhan kung kailan mare-release ang TF. Make it worth their while by supporting the fruits of their labor (thus my choice to start purchasing games & apps that I find awesome. Thankfully I can always wait ‘til they’re on sale lololol), or by proposing an X-deal.
12. People follow different timelines. This is kinda similar to #3: do NOT compare yourself with others. A year ago, I found myself wallowing in self-pity: “Pakshet I was already 4 when my mom was 29. Now I’m 29 and I’m single, I just quit my job, I need to freelance like crazy if I want to survive, I need to find new housemates if I want to keep my place…at ni pusa wala ako!” I’m at that stage in my life where people are getting engaged/married and popping babies out left and right. Sure it can feel alienating at times…but then I’ve realized that even if I suddenly found myself switching bodies with them ala-Freaky Friday? I wouldn’t be happy.
13. Make the most out of what you have. I have lots of time-consuming hobbies/skills (from experimenting with creative makeup projects, translating stuff, shooping strangers’ photos for good deed/lulz/beer money, recording and editing my own VOs, to caring for rescued furbabies) that often make people say, “Ang dami mong time!”,“Ang lakas ng trip mo!” or the frustrating, “Bakit mo ginagawa yan?” (especially if I’m not getting monetary returns from said skill). But that’s the point—I’m not yet married nor do I have a kid, ergo I still have the time to focus on my own interests/well-being. Instead of obsessing about the things missing in your life and posting one hugot meme after another, keep yourself busy by developing your skills while you still caaan. Pramis that feeling of accomplishment is 10x more empowering than listening to Chaka Khan. Which brings me to…
14. …never let yourself go. Please refer to the screenshot in #6. I know it’s easy to ditch when the going gets tough, so if you have somebody who loves you at your worst, that’s fantastic! But that’s still not an excuse for you to become a bahala-na-si-Batman-basta-my-partner-loves-me slacker when it comes to your own future and overall well-being. Kumbaga, finding someone who loves you is not an excuse for you to stop loving yourself.
15. Accept the idea that everyone has his/her own blunder years. My blunder years happened in 2010-2013, when I was in my first relationship-turned-engagement-turned-heartbreak. I do NOT regret that it happened; I regret how I didn’t bother having my own foresight as soon as “we” and “us” were established, which left me scrambling to plan and prepare for my own future at 26. I’ve become the complete opposite of my blunder years self so I’d like to think that I still have the chance to turn things around after learning sooo many things from my experiences. Ay tenkyu baw.
16. Never stop trying to be Something From Nothing. I swear this is going somewhere, and not just because I wanna add a link to my life anthem: your life may suck now, but it’s not going to get better if you don’t do something. Besides, it feels sooo good when you look back on your Poorita Mirasol days and see how far you’ve come. 
17. Let people have their own fun. Been there, done that—being a hater won’t make you any happier (except Musical.ly FFS I will never understand dat sh*t).
18. Stop waiting for the “perfect timing”. This is your life and it’s ending one minute at time.
19. People outgrow people and it’s normal. I can’t hate the people who’ve outgrown me because I myself am guilty of outgrowing other people. Ganun talaga ang buhay, and the least I can do is be glad that we shared moments of iyakan, tawanan, blah blah that helped me become who I am now. So: Hello besh! I hope you know that I don’t hate you. In case I treated you poorly, I’m sorry. I’ll always be grateful that you became a part of my life and rest assured that I’m always rooting for your success even if I don’t fit in your life now. Salamat.
20. Choose your people because everything is temporary. Because life is too short to waste by seeking validation from people who obviously don’t care to show if they still exist/check if you still exist, learn how you, too, can choose your people and make a damn effort keeping them so you’ll never have to refer to #19.
21. Self-awareness is valuable. If you don’t want a fast-walking grumpy girl bitch about your being an inconsiderate pedestrian/MRT commuter/escalator rider in Facebook, DEVELOP SELF-AWARENESS. The world does not revolve around you, so try to always put yourself in other peoples’ shoes before acting like a prick in public.
22. Sometimes, it really is only words. As someone who vomits words for a living, I can testify that words can be cheap thus they should not cause you to overthink yourself til 4am. When words are used recklessly and waaay too often, they can lose their power. Remember to value actions, as well as the beauty of leaving some words unsaid.
23. Today you, tomorrow me. Nowadays kindness is even more elusive than that freakin pack of Korean spicy noodles, so if someone performs an act of kindness, remember to pay it forward.
24. Life’s shitty moments will fertilize your growth. In a few months you will look back on your lugmok-sa-putikan moments and even initiate the mockery of it all while gigglegroaning. You’ll be fine; be thankful that soon, you’ll know AND be better.
25. People are smart. In the real world, your alma mater doesn’t matter, because there are thousands of people who are as smart as you are (…or even smarter!), in their own special areas.
26. Enjoy idleness. Tengga moments rarely happen to adults who deal with never-ending deliverables, priorities and obligations so if you find yourself “bored” and restless…congratulations for being able to afford boredom! Make the most out of it.
27. Research, research, research. Google is continuously innovating their features to make sure that you can school yourself faster and easier–use that to your advantage so you can avoid being a victim of hearsays. Dyusko, sa internet all it takes is a few clicks for you to get second (and third and fourth…) opinion. To remain inutil at this time and age is cancerous.
28. Everyone has his/her own problems. Worrying about what other people will say becomes useless because they’re preoccupied, dealing with their own lives…unless you’re a celebrity who needs to protect his/her every move because the stakes are higher, of course.
29. Think long-term. “This palette can probably pay for a 5-night stay in a comfy hostel abroad on February.” (because again, memories stay foreeever!!)
30. It’s okay to wait. That’s what #s 12, 13 & 14 are for. 🙂